Hello Teniola,
I have been following your blog for few months now. I saw your post about relationships on Facebook. I hope I get answers on your blog.
My boyfriend's ex recently moved to town and she is part of his group of friends from school. I have expressed jealousy and concern over her presence in his life. I have been dating him for 9months now. She is engaged but my worry isn't about her doing anything. My fear is that he is fooling himself and he has a special feelings for her that will keep us from being able to forge something new. I have never believed in being good friends with an ex and need to be more open-minded. Maybe it is because this is an especially close group of friends and I don't feel like I fit in.
Should I just work to get over my jealousy since he has assured me again and again that I have nothing to worry about? Or, since the jealousy really stems from my insecurities, is this something that will be impossible for me to get past until I take time to be by myself? Some people say that it is OK to be friends with an ex, others say it can't be done without there being some kind of intimate feelings there. Pls can you share my worries with your readers? I would like to hear your opinion and everyone else.
Thank you
Shy girl!
Hello Shy chic,
I would quote you in your own words. 'Should I just work to get over my jealousy since he has assured me again and again that I have nothing to worry about?'. You shouldn't be your own problem my dear. Go out with his friends and forget about his ex. You are in a relationship with him not with everyone else. Focus on him. You can also share your insecurities with him so he can help you through the social outing and worries. Goodluck!
Teniola.
Guys pls give shy chic an advice. Should she worry about an engaged ex?
Shy gal do not worry about an ex. She's even engaged but if you feel uncomfortable with their hang out. Tell your boyfriend if he priortizes you he would stop hanging with her.
ReplyDeleteDeal with your insecurities, the rest will be easy
ReplyDeleteIt's obvious you have the man, get rid of jealousy and you'll be fine
ReplyDeleteTalk it over with your bf, its his responsibility to protect you. All the best
ReplyDeleteWhile she should deal with her jealousy, i think he shouldn't hang around too closely with an ex.
ReplyDeleteDon't hang with them at social places. Create a new social schedules for your bf and invite his friends. Let it be your call so you can feel good with the plans. The ex wouldn't come with them
ReplyDeleteInsecurities is her major Issue. She shld work on that
ReplyDeleteBuiti
She needs to concentrate on her relationship and forget about the engaged Ex. And deal with her unnecessary insecurities. Mz!
ReplyDeleteShy gal, its natural to feel jealous so its better to talk it over with you guy and let your instincts aid your decisions and guide your acts in the relationship.
ReplyDelete